Monday, November 26, 2007

The Litmus Test of Ingratitude

I was faced yesterday with this subtle distinction between appreciation and gratitude. Appreciation is being thankful on one end of a spectrum but fails to acknowledge the source of that thankfulness...Gratitude is when the source is acknowledge...Ingratitude emerges in forms of envy, pride, bitterness...living in the past...for me I find myself preparing for the 'worst'. A sort of defensive posture that is ready to pounce on an anticipated worst case outcome. It's somewhat crazy actually and this epiphanal awareness is an engrained habit that when mixed with stess and caffeine makes for an intolerable batting cage of reaction. It's like I'm opening a Christmas gift expecting it to be a bomb or a box of nothing or worse a tie...I'm preparing myself for ingratitude. The conditioned response, the presumed preparation for worst case, is really a habitual preparation for ingratitude...The lowering of your expectations protects you from disapointment but over time conditions you out of the ability to recieve the fulness of the gift which makes the words 'thank you' hollow. So now the long slow road to identify the trigger mechanism of worst case fantasy management and start practicing full cup gratitude.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Consider these 2 quotes for further pensive reflection:

"To feel gratitude and not express it is like wrapping a present and not giving it." (W.A. Ward)

"Gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder." (GK Chesterton)

To your point, ingratitude does handicap our ability to fully receive goodness, grace and grandeur - but it also inclines us to withhold a gift to the giver.

And, I've always liked Chesterton's mind - so his description of gratitude is right on and succinct as usual!

Jeff Harris said...

Those are great quotes...your right about Chesterton...he can synthesize and crystalize like few others.